Booty Display : J.lo vs. Nicki Minaj: The New Feminism?…Ramble

Beyonce is the poster child for feminism these days, despite whatever is going on behind closed doors. (Have we all been drawn in to the master plan of headlines that compelled ticket sales for her joint tour with her husband only to hear pregnancy rumors? Yes!)

If Queen B (and she’s not the first to claim that title), is the face of feminism and she sings about riding on Hova’s surfboard, her ass gyrating for all to see, is that any different than the outright tribute to her own ass, J.lo has released?

For years people have been commenting on Jenny from the Block’s rear assets. When I met her I was shocked at how tiny that rear is, but it’s all relative once you zoom in on something. Is that the new definition of feminism? Everyone’s talking about your ass so own it? Well this is a spectacular way of doing it:

If people are unable to get out of bed today because they are waxing their own surfboards with the release of this video, what is the difference between this and the tongue-in-cheek hit “Anaconda” by Nicki Minaj?

Well, for one thing, the taste-level. Jlo may be chewing gum and smoking cigarettes, but she’s doing it in a closed studio, ‘artistically’ and it’s just her ass and Iggy (Nicki’s rival), celebrating how their milkshakes bring the boys to the yard. Hmm, counterpoint so is Nicki, but in a much more over-the-top crass way with coconut milk dripping and mentioning how her pussy tires out her man so much he calls her NyQuil.

The dictionary defines feminism:


1. the doctrine advocating social, political, and all other rights of women equal to those of men.
2.(sometimes initial capital letter) an organized movement for the attainment of such rights for women.
3. feminine character.
Both J.Lo and Nicki are taking their own rights as women to exploit their assets to earn the big dollars men are not providing for them. Nicki’s lyrics advocate getting men to buy her things and are generally crude.  Is it about packaging? ‘Anaconda’ has been viewed on YouTube over 177 million times. Men are not thinking about feminism, they are jerking off to it and every time they do, I can hear the cha-ching building up in Nicki’s VEVO account.
Both women smack other women’s asses in their videos, both shake, twerk and leave on a bikini-string to keep them from being ‘fully’ exposed. If we look at Miley’s video for ‘Wrecking Ball’ which, IMHO, is her version of Christina Aguilera’s ‘Beautiful’, that is, until she starts licking steel. Despite protests about Miley not having to ruin the artistry of that moment, fans have watched that video over 700 million times and is on track to hit a billion.
At the end of the day, women are still the first ones to get laid off and get paid 60 cents on the dollar if we are lucky. Has feminism morphed into a marketing idea or are these popstars really in control? I’d certainly like to believe it, because even though Jessie J sang ‘it ain’t about the money’, those are lyrics and we live in reality where bills have to get paid and most of us are not turning down sponsorship deals, we’re sponsoring ourselves! Shake those asses ladies, I’ll take the t-bills that are dropping out of them.

Girls…We Run This Motha with the Beygency…Ramble

Queen B, the mantle Lorde covets in ‘Royals’, the one Lil’ Kim used to make claim to, but everyone knows sits firmly atop that of Beyonce. Bey, you a grown woman, you do what you wanna do. That’s why you were able (with help) to make a secret album that is better than your previous effort, release it with zero marketing and hit numero uno. I personally call Zumba, “Exhaustion Set To Beyonce” and let me tell you I let out a huge cry of ‘no!!!!!!’ when Antonio, one of the Zumba teachers I love, tried to skip Beyonce yesterday. Oh HELL no. Who are we? We are girls, we run the world. Who run this motha? GIRLS!

Literally my name ‘Colleen’ is Gaelic for girl, so I run this world especially during ZUMBA with the help of Beyonce.

I was out all over two states last night and felt celebrated, by other women who I haven’t seen in a minute and had never met. Women, we are killing it. We are making our own rules and we are not alone. So let’s not take each other down and let’s hail to Queen B, because if you don’t stepping to the left, to the left may be the last thing you do………..:

Only Gamble On Love…Ramble

A few days ago I was delayed in the Las Vegas Airport so I hit the Dolly Parton slot machines, sucking down a much needed ice coffee from Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf and watched for updates that our flight would actually leave.

I told a friend what I was doing and she told me “only bet on love.” My reaction was different than the last few months, which were spent dealing with some major heart break. Major. It’s like that scene in all the Alien movies when the creature bursts forth out of the humans’ chests- painful and unnecessary.

What if you bet it all on love and it kicked you in the teeth? Maybe taking up Zumba, aka exhaustion via Beyonce songs, will help. After all once you’ve been humiliated by love or lust or a crush or just life in general, shouldn’t you let it all hang out? Beyonce ‘Run The World (Girls)’ and ‘Grown Woman‘ are always going to be the crowd favorites:

However, a little foray into some air guitar and zombie moves with jumps to P!nk’s “So What” let me vent my frustrations:

And you know what? He is a tool, a rake of the highest degree. I was working at Sony when that P!NK album came out and it just cemented how much I j’adore P!NK and her sass. How did I lose sight of my own? Of course, P!NK’s self-expression lead to a reconciliation and mine has lead to me going big in ZUMBA. But so what? “You are obviously the superstar of this relationship” will always stick with me as I almost busted my ankle pounding into the wood floors a few days ago. When you bet it all on love, when you lose, the pain can be a crushing vice splintering the shards of your broken heart into dust, but yet you have to bet it all if you want to win. And, fellas, I’m worth winning.