My Top Fave Reality Parties 2011: Real Housewives…Ramble

The secrets to creating an event for most of us include food and beverages, decorations and of course, a good guest list. For The Housewives of New York, Hotlanta, The Dirty Jers and Beverly Hills includes entertainment from fire eaters to being the performers themselves (hello Sonia Morgan.)

Here’s a few of the most outrageous parties thrown by the Housewives in a bit of a Face-Off.

BABY SHOWERS:
Dirty Jers: In the season opener, Theresa’s congrats to her brother Joey sparked a fist fight that included senior citizens and women alike. Children were, of course present since it was a baby shower and reprecussions went on for half the season. The saddest part, other than Tre’s kids seeing it all go down, was when Joey cries to his father pleading for them to be a family. The whole escalation was frightening and as much as Bravo watchers have embraced this younger, sexy generation who seem to need to hump anytime anywhere, the frightening fisticuffs left me horrified.

Hotlanta: It seemed like a very quaint, non-wedding for Kim and Kroy’s baby shower. I loved when Phaedra tried to proclaim it reminded her of her baby shower. P- you are a saucy, sassy Southern Belle with a helluva a libido, but Phaedra there was no bizarre dancing or Duh-wight anywhere to be seen. However, things heated up between husbands when Peter the Elderly Husband of model Cynthia Bailey, decided to mix it up with Phaedra’s hubbie, Hunky Ex-Con. Um, Peter dude, shouldn’t you be thinking you are trying to be a Grown-Ass Man? Why are you so incredibly immature and hostile especially after you nabbed the fabulous Cynthia, who you constantly bring down several levels?

Winner… for Class (???): Hotlanta because no actual fists were thrown. Mr. Hunky Ex-Con decided to be the bigger man and back away.

BIRTHDAY PARTIES:

New York: It seems there’s nothing the New York cast likes to do than celebrate birthdays from the elaborate Sweet 16’s of Ramona and The Countess threw for their daughters…on the very same night, and of course Alex’s party on Governor’s Island and that annoying woman Cindy’s party in Quogue, The Countess’ suprize birthday party and even Ramona’s suprize joint birthday party with Sonia.

Beverly Hills: Taylor decided to have a ‘more child-friendly’ party for her daughter this year with 200 of their closest friends. Her daughter was turning five. They rented out a horse farm where Tay-Tay freaked out as the set-up was so last minute and her party-planning BFF, Dana, who always seems like she just smoked a pack of Malboro Reds and ignores negativity, saunters up an hour late. Taylor spent her own big 4-0 in Vegas next to former frienemy, Lisa Vanderpump at Lisa’s daughter’s bachlorette party.

Hotlanta: You didn’t think I’d miss a chance to remind you of Kandi’s 35th Birthday which included a stripper named Ridiculous, a gift from Phaedra did you? A stripper who could pleasure himself. I thought Pandora was the one having the bachlorette party? I mean Kandi’s Momma was there. It was just not the setting at what looked like a very high-end hotel.

Winner for pure volume: While NY had volume in numbers, and Hotlanta had the volume of Ridiculous’ Um, Donkey Dong, I’ve got to give it up for Taylor’s lips.

THEMED PARTIES
The White Party by Kyle Richards where she forces all of her devious friends to pretend they are as pure, or at least dress as pure as the driven snow. Alleged Abuser Slash Husband of Taylor- Russell has decided to threaten Camille Grammar for repeating Taylor’s abuse allegations…which were in ‘private’ (filmed) and how would he have known what she said unless Taylor mentioned it? So, this gets the Armstrongs barred from The White Party. Sad especially when last year Russell stranded Taylor there, she had a good cry on Kyle’s bed and then they danced the night away.

Adrienne Malouf’s Fashion Show… is that a theme? Cause if so, she did a great job of upping She by Sheree just a notch. The fashion show was to benefit Step Up, but it was also to debut the shoes Adrienne is now selling for $15K a pair. Malouf claims she didn’t want to detract from the charity aspect by actually showing off the shoes. Models wore outfits that covered the shoes, as did Adrienne herself. What is it with The Emperor Has No Clothes/Shoes theme by default Stop throwing fake fashion shows on TV if you don’t want attention drawn to your brand.

Sonia Morgan’s Ballroom Party … New Yorker’s are very busy, and apparently Sonia is so busy she forgot the bottom half of her costume. Instead of hiding in a corner, Sonia was brazen enough to bend over and show off her ass as much as possible.

Winner: Kyle of BH because she is the only one with an intentional themed party.

I’m looking forward to seeing the wedding parties of both Kim to Kroy and Lisa’s daughter Pandy to her man Jason. And, with that I leave you with this thought:

My Five Favorite Pop Videos of 2011…Ramble

There was a millisecond when I couldn’t get enough of’Pumped Up Kicks’ by Foster The People which ended abruptly when I heard it mixed into a mix with actual pop music on Z100. This was just not the place for them and it was so jarring. While anything that makes Top 40 radio is then ‘pop’ as in ‘popular’ music, rhymically there are ebbs and flows and it slowed the flow down inside a otherwise dance music marathon. Here’s are my favorite pure pop videos of the year.

5. Britney Spears “Dancing Til The World Ends” – dance, or at least motion like you are dancing Britney. I have to give props for my fellow December baby who turned 30 the first week of the month and who’s mantoy Jason turns 40 today. Double December Couple?! Powerful. If you want to see Jason’s torso watch Britney’s “Criminal” video, but if you wanna dance you’ve come to the right place.

4. Swedish House Mafia “Save The World” there is seriously nothing as pure as canine love. When you come home and this little soul comes to find you and just lift your spirits, it is a thing of beauty. Hats off to SHM who champion the healing power of canine love.

3. Selena Gomez & The Scene “Love You Like A Love Song” there is no denying I would like this one on repeat-eat-eat-eat. It’s fun, it’s young and appeals to the karaoke lover in me, plus I sing this to my Frenchie when we are in the car. It brings me back to my Disney Days working for the Mouse House. I love the sassy Ms. Gomez and this song was an instant favorite as soon as I heard it.

2. Rihanna ft. Calvin Harris “We Found Love (In A Hopeless Place)” did they meet at work? No, more like a rave that morphed into a crack den, but this tune is undeniable and we see Riri acting. This one shows off quite nicely the trend of director’s treating videos like films with title credits and story plots.

And finally….

1. David Guetta “Where Them Girls At?” feat. Nicki Minaj and Flo Rida. I love a great party song and this one hits it right on the head.

My Five Favorite Rock Videos of 2011…Ramble

There’s something about rock music that it can transport you to visceral emotions or sway you with it’s unexpected deep lyrics. As the former Head of Music Video Programming Once Upon A Pre-Recession at Yahoo! Music a few years ago, I always pay special attention to videos and their impact. While the art form sometimes suffers under it’s own weight and many ridiculous egos, it’s a place where artists in the indie-alt rock category can often catch our eye and bust our eyes wide open, so here are five that stayed with me this year.

5. SBTRTK “Wildfire” the raw emotion is timed so well with the song, it evokes the tension and resolve of the musicality of the song.

4. Washed Out “Eyes Be Closed” – I’m the first to admit, there’s nothing too complicated going on in this video but some times all you need is a woman, a motorcycle, great lighting, confetti and a really cool song.

3. Snow Patrol “Called Out In The Dark” easily could have made my funniest videos of the year. Endearing, heart warming and a really great song. I love that Gary Lightbody is dressed like, well Gary Lightbody.

2. Florence + The Machine “Shake It Out (Aol Sessions)”- a stunning and captivating performance by Flo. I am addicted to her new album ‘Ceremonials’ with my favorite track chaging with as each new track begins. I was lucky enough to have been at this taping and it was a true highlight of my year, while a co-worker had to gag me in the director’s booth from singing along. Ohhhh wooooooahhhh ohhhh. Don’t the edison lights look amazing? Pure love for the crew at Aol.

1. And finally… you know he had to be number one, James Blake’s “The Wilhelm Scream.” This was one of my first introductions to this clever, talented young man. I had the random luck of stepping up and becoming his U.S. product manager until a few weeks ago. I will say from SXSW to the last time I saw him in October, James is a very special artist and made me less cynical about the music industry. So why don’t you just fall in?

My Five Fave Funny Videos 2011….. Ramble

Making em laugh and they’ll always come back. This is my advice over and over to which some listen and perhaps doubled their social media because of it, and some ignored are on the outskirts of life! Just kidding.

These are my favorite funny videos of the year:

5. Katy Perry “Last Friday Night”- wait, what? You know while I’m not a great fan of Katy’s when she sings out of her range, I love that she can write a great pop song and this video is hilarious. Who doesn’t want Debbie Gibson as their mom?!!

4. K$sha “Blow”- Unicorns. Van Der Beek. Lasers. We’re young and we’re bored.

3. Thom Yorke “Single Ladies” – originally Radiohead’s ‘Lotus Flower’ amped up to remind us that “Single Ladies” is the greatest song to dance to since the invention of Beyonce’s booty. This spawned many other syncs of the dance to “Milkshake” and “Safetydance” as well as giving Thom some guns to kill The Biebs, but this one is still my favorite.

2. Sara Bareilles “Gonna Get Over You” – very nearly almost forget Sara’s best video ever! Who hasn’t danced down shopping aisles losing themselves in the moment?

And finally… anyone who worked with me will appreciate and know that I brainwashed them to use this song as a stress release and made it into my personal themesong, often coming in to find I uh, threw a lot of stuff on the ground…..thanks to Beth, Frank, Nat, Michelle and Renata for helping me pick that shit up off the ground.

1. The Lonely Island “Threw It On The Ground”

I do want to mention an honorable mention: The Lonely Island feat. Michael Bolton “Jack Sparrow.” I became obsessed with this song from the first time I heard it in a meeting, which was awful because then I didn’t have my own copy to listen to ad nauseum for another couple of months. When the video came out, I think I had it on repeat 24/7 for at least a week. I would walk down the street busting out ‘Life is a box of chocolates and my name is Forrest Gump.’ Not better.